Lately, I’ve been on a journey — both physical and emotional — and through contemplation, one notion keeps circling back to me: space. Not just the kind we can measure in square feet, but the kind we feel. The kind that shapes how we connect with others, how we work, how we show up in the world.
Over the past 30 years of building companies, designing workplaces, and creating environments that people are drawn to, I’ve learned something I can’t unsee- space is never neutral. It either works for you or against you. It can invite connection or quietly shut it down. It can restore and heal or, without us even realizing it, slowly drain us. It can spark creativity and focus… or it can make both impossible.
And yet, most leaders don’t see it that way. They overlook the fact that design, furnishings, and the way we shape our surroundings aren’t just aesthetic choices, they’re strategic business tools. And more than that, they’re deeply human tools.
When I think about space, three ideas keep surfacing: creating space, making space, and holding space. I’ve wondered if they’re separate acts or if the real magic happens in how they work together. Honestly? I think it’s both. And I love all of it.
Creating Space
Creating space is intentional- it’s how we set a tone before anyone even says a word. It’s about more than what a room looks like; it’s about how it feels the moment you walk in.
For me, that means paying attention to all the senses. Lighting a candle. Bringing in fresh flowers. Adding a throw to the sofa or placing a stack of pillows in a corner that invites you to sink in. It might be a pot of coffee brewing or a bottle of sparkling water chilling in the fridge. The right music playing in the background- something upbeat when you want energy, soft when you need calm, or soulful when you want people to linger.
We think about creating that kind of environment for a dinner party, a beautiful hotel lobby, or a favorite restaurant. But why shouldn’t we do the same in our offices and our home where we work, think, or create?
Small, deliberate touches can change the way a space feels and the way people feel in it. Color, scent, lighting, sound… each makes an impression. Bold colors hit differently than cool neutrals; rhythmic music stirs you in a way Enya never will (or, as my daughter calls it, “boomer music”). Creating space doesn’t have to be expensive or complex, often, it’s the smallest shift that changes everything.
Quick tips for creating space: Adjust/Dim lighting, add in natural light, light candles, make sure music fits the mood, think about noise reduction in some cases, incorporate plants or flowers, remove clutter from any space. Think about how the space supports the activity.
Making Space
This one feels lost in today’s world.
With texts, tweets, and emojis replacing real conversation, I sometimes wonder if we’re truly making space for each other. My daughter will say she “talked” to someone, but what she means is that she sent a message.
Making space is choosing to give your full attention to one thing, or one person, at a time. No phone, no laptop, no Apple Watch buzzing on your wrist. Just presence. It’s about offering what is arguably the most valuable thing we have: our time, which can’t be replenished once it’s spent.
I have to make space for my own mental health. I have to make space for my employees and teammates. My kids and my husband deserve it, too. And I’ve learned that’s what our children want most from us is not more stuff, but more of us.
I was sitting on a beach in Croatia recently, surrounded by families speaking dozens of languages. And yet, no matter the language, the one phrase I heard again and again from kids to their parents was the same: “Watch me! Watch me!”
It was a reminder that making space, being fully present, is one of the simplest, most powerful gifts we can give.
Things to think about this week: when you are interacting with people, where is your attention? Are you distracted or providing your full attention? What is your body language saying?
Holding Space
This, I think, is the hardest and the most transformative.
Holding space means creating a safe place where someone can be fully heard without judgment, without interruption, without rushing to fix or improve. It’s not about offering solutions or cheering someone up. It’s about meeting them exactly where they are, letting them feel what they need to feel, and staying present through it. UGH!!
It’s uncomfortable for many of us, especially those of us who care deeply. We want to make it better, to do something, to fix the pain. But sometimes, the greatest kindness we can offer is to be still beside someone and let them know they’re not alone. And for women, being there to cheer on other women when they succeed. If we hold space for each other, we all grow together in that space. Hold space for each other through tough times and triumphs.
And here’s the part we often forget: you can’t hold space for others if you don’t also hold space for yourself.
This week think about how you like to be “heard.” Are you listening to yourself? When engaging with others, what is your internal dialogue saying about them and you?
Space is more than where we are.
It’s the way we shape it, the way we inhabit it, and the way we protect it for others. And when we learn to create it, make it, and hold it with intention, it’s not just good design- it’s good business, good leadership, and good living.
